In preparation for this years cancer walk two friends pushed me yesterday for a trial run of part of it. With wind howling and biting cold we made it home in two hours! Good on us eh?!
Sorry about absence lately but it’s such a tedious process to post something here. As you know I write with my eyes then I send it to Jay to edit as I can’t do it on my eye gaze computer. He then sends it back to me and I send it to him to post, phew! Just earlier I spent an hour writing the first stage of blog and lost it! Many expletives later and a spontaneous visit from lovely friend with her daughter I was back on my horse again!
Went to Declan O’ Rourke gig on Valentines night and we all really enjoyed it. Me Jay, Lucy, Tomas and Ana joined in on this fabulous love fest! This time with my new wheelchair, I felt the luckiest in da haus!!! The most comfortable anyway. Unfortunately my gang had no seats and three hours later, all had legs of jelly. Declan is an amazing singer and a gorgeous person. Was interesting to hear stories about his background. A Dub like me and Jay but from much humbler beginnings in Ballyfermot (wonder if he was a neighbour to Joe Duffy?!) Anyroad, he has got something that Joe certainly doesn’t have and that’s sex appeal! Not particularly a good looking singer but he has a charisma that works. “Ok ok Tomas and Jay, the songs about the famine were totally unnecessary I agree, but I plan to make it known to him via email”. We had a good laugh about it anyway. I just can’t understand how such a bleak and depressing past can help our present recession state of mind, so thoroughly uninspiring. But we’ll let him off!. Got a gorgeous smile when leaving as Lucy was buying cd’s for me and her which he signed. Gone our rock chick days when we never paid into a gig nor got anything signed!
So we got a second hand van. A bright red one which I can be wheeled onto easily. This means even more freedom to roam. A few weeks ago Ana drove me and Lucy to Tesco’s which was a great adventure for me as I haven’t been food shopping in yonks! Being able to browse the isles and fill a basket of desired food was a joy (avoided horse meat lasagne though!)
Had a tough ol’ few days last week. Had bladder trouble so doc prescribed antibiotics which worked well. Also I was advised to wean myself off medication for ‘secretions’ medical term for dribbles which I did gladly as the taste is the most vile ever. But I just found out recently these little buggers have mood enhancing qualities. So coming off them was like going through the worst nightmare ever. With half the usual dose, I became a werewolf incarnate. Jaysus tonight! I couldn’t cope. Poor hubby got the brunt as I growled at him and my mum when they tried to help. Amazing how the levels of pure intolerance and frustration got completely out of hand. Despite this we still managed to bring kids to the cinema, Tinkerbelle was a sparkled filled escape.
Sunday we celebrated twelve years of married life. Still I couldn’t stop the tears. One of my lovely sister’s in law and her partner were scheduled for a short visit. Was I able to see anyone in my cold turkey state, I asked myself. Something inside said don’t cancel and I trusted it. I explained the situation to my guests and they completely understood. They showered me with freshly picked flowers and brought homemade honey which the kids especially love. I had really wanted to show them how well I am doing but I suppose it’s not always possible. We had arranged a blessing from a priest friend for later and had invited one of Jay’s lovely sisters and her great husband. In tears again, I said ‘I can’t pretend ‘ so I didn’t . We went on to have the most beautiful afternoon, blessing and champagne filled, kids too, love full and of course, belly laughs galore.
I’ve been listening to a couple of great women on youtube who really inspire me. Brandon Bays had a tumour the size of a water melon in her belly which she managed to self-heal. And Lynn McTaggart, author of many books including one called “the Field” talks about “healing the trauma ” in cancer. Lynn is more scientific about how our energy works and how the power of intention can heal. So I will show you first an interview between both women and a much longer talk then with Lynn to be watched when kids go to bed as you will need full attention! I have been listening to the above with Natasja at lunch time and we both get a lot from it.