Reflections on Christmas 2013

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I was wondering about how I was doing this time last year and both Jonnie and Mum reassured me I appear stronger and more content. There’s truth in their observations as I feel more able to cope and I recognize my limits with tiredness before they get out of hand and the whole house is affected. Yikes when that happens!
Jonnie did a fabulous job of the turkey and ham thanks to some youtube advice from Gordon Ramsey early Christmas morning. Lucy did fabulous veggies,Tomas made heavenly sherry trifle and Mum laid a beautiful table. The kids were delighted with their seemingly endless amount of presents and the day flowed with the usual sense of hibernation that only this day brings.
Being stuck in a wheelchair without use of hands or speech is such a challenge as a mother. A fellow sufferer who I’ve been in contact with described it as “raw grief “. Not being able to wrap a present or unwrap one for that matter, or share the joy spontaneously with the kids early Christmas morning is a bummer. However, without dwelling too much on what I cant do, I am often spontaneously surprised by joy too. Kitty, for the second year running, came into my room with a present for me to open after she opened her first one. Her thoughtfulness is something I ‘m so proud of, she’s such a wonderful little girl. We get to snuggle sometimes at night too if she sleeps downstairs. She puts her little hand in mine and I lift my leg to make way for hers. Then she seranades me with songs and one sided chat. How I wish my voice was alive for those extra special moments

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6 responses »

  1. Hi Emma.
    Such a beautiful picture you have painted of your home ar Christmas . Happy new year to you and lots of luck and only good and positive things for you in 2014.
    Cal x

  2. Harrah ….. Emma my messages are getting through to you again. Been having huge problems with my Internet over the last two months .
    Great to be in touch again.
    Cal x

  3. Hi Emma,
    I loved hearing about your Christmas…sounds like it was lovely in every way. Adored the image of ‘Kitty” cuddling up with you..that is one of the most beautiful feelings in the world!
    Happy New Year!
    All My Love,
    Nick oxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

  4. Hi Star,
    It is so true what Mom & Jonnie say – you are STRONG & you are in control – & a mighty fine job you do of everything too Star. You are so focused, clear & organised in the way you do things which is how you always have been but that’s just YOU! I am always trying to be like that but find it difficult !!
    I LOVED hibernating in your cosy, colourful home over Christmas & I love reading over this as a reminder & hearing of sweet Kitty! She is an adorable little girl. So full of love & thoughtfulness – just like YOU xxxxxxxx

  5. Em, as a mother myself I feel your pain in not being able to hug the kids and talk to them. It’s probably the one aspect of your situation that upsets me the most on your behalf. To hear how loving and tactile your kids are towards you shows that they are spontaneously and enthusiastically reflecting back the love they feel from you. They don’t see ‘limits’ – they just see their beautiful mom. You’ve done a fantastic job in mothering them and the fact that they are so natural with you shows just how strong your bond with eachother is. You should be very proud of that. How could they be anything other than kind, caring and fun when that is precisely what their mother is? And Jonny too of course but I’m addressing this to you. They are following your wonderful example and picking up on all the love around them. You are playing a blinder as a mother. Would that all the able bodied, mouthy mothers who batter their kids etc had the same excellent parenting skills as you. Big hugs, hope to see you soon X

  6. Hi Emma!
    Every time that I read one of your posts I am touched in a way that has no comparison, you are truly amazing. It is so nice to hear about your lovely Christmas, I can feel all the love through the computer screen. I was thinking about and missing you all so much over the holidays, I’d love to be able to visit again soon! Love you and miss you lots xoxoxo

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